New Beginnings, Creative Stagnation & Life's Purpose

My life has changed significantly in the last half decade I’ve been absent. Five years ago my life consisted of traveling all around and documenting my experiences, writing educational content for websites and magazines, writing and filming informational videos related to creativity and photography, shooting weddings and conceptual portraits with models, and working on a myriad of projects to fill up my remaining waking time. But then, something changed.

I had just gotten back from this amazing trip to New England that made me feel this blissful happiness and filled me with a sense of purpose and intent which I’ve never experienced in my life prior. The very next morning I was off to a wedding. I wasn’t actually shooting this wedding, but rather I was in the wedding. I normally didn’t “do weddings” outside of business, but I vowed years ago that whenever my friend got married I wouldn’t miss it. I’m so glad that I did. I ended up meeting the most amazing person and fell into a deep, impenetrable love.

My Beautiful Girlfriend

That event took place five years ago. Along the way, I’ve transitioned out of shooting models and weddings, stopped writing for magazines and websites, got into day trading as a replacement income, had a beautiful baby with my equally beautiful girlfriend, transitioned from day trading to swing trading, and got into the IT field. The way I traveled even changed. It became less about content creation and self-exploration and more about sharing amazing experiences with the ones that I love.

All of these experiences left me with a new sense of direction for my personal life and career. Unfortunately, a problem arose out of all this. With all the new and exciting changes, a void started creeping in. Although I gained so much, I lost my creative drive. All the areas of my life were ticked off except my creative ones. Everything had a replacement, but the reason I enjoyed the things I used to never had a valid replacement. That sense of purpose and renewed spirit from five years ago came out of this self-expression through my creative endeavors. No longer did I have any personal projects to work on or provide me with this sense of wonderment I had once experienced.

My cute baby on a recent trip

I’ve known this was the case for a long time now but I could never figure out how to add it back into this new chapter in my life. This slowly started eating away at me until I fell into a state of depression. I found ways to placate the feeling but never truly eliminate it. Truth is, I never was going to find a solution without the inclusion of a creative project. These are the things that kept my creative drive alive my whole life. So, I came up with a plan to get it back.

I have no plans to go back to what I once had with Write Lighting. The past is the past and I’d like to move on. I’ve never been one for nostalgia or dwelling on what once was. I’d much rather create fresh experiences that can bring me a new kind of joy and fulfillment. Originally, my plan when creating “Write Lighting” was meant to be a collaboration of ideas and creativity, It was never meant to be solely about myself or else I would’ve just branded it appropriately. The goals of Write Lighting shifted over time and I’d like to take it into the next chapter of its life.

I’m going to be rebranding and remodeling this website to better suit the needs of my next projects and creative outlets. I’m not sure what that’ll look like quite yet, but I know that it’ll be different. The one thing I’ve learned, and always loved, was the concept of life being this grand journey. The destination is irrelevant to me. Where I end up is less important than how I get there. The experiences I have and share along the way are what truly matter to me and I intend to take you guys along for the ride.

I have another post coming up explaining a personal project I’m starting that has to do with documenting my new life experiences using Instax. You can follow that journey on my personal Instagram or check out my next post here for more details on what it’s all about.